Apologetic Earrings

Be More of Who You Already Are

About a decade ago I found myself in a style rut. I was wearing the same things over again and felt a need for a more planned approach to my wardrobe. So I enrolled in an evening course to learn some basic principles.

It was run by the very stylish Lola.

Lola would swish, jingle and perfume her way into the room in her flowing pants, colourful scarves and bold earrings and take our small group through the rules of mixing and matching, purposeful mis-matching and age appropriate dressing.

Lola taught me that fashion is fickle but style is perennial, florals can be mixed with stripes (as long as you know what you're doing) and one important rule that I recently remembered - never wear apologetic jewellery.

Lola explained that apologetic jewellery is the type of jewellery you wore when you were five years old. You know the type - small, light and transient.

Lola's rule for style was to wear bold jewellery - big earrings, sparkly rings and man-sized watches.

As I prepared for a photo shoot to create my new branding recently I recalled Lola's advice.

Thinking about what I was going to wear, including my jewellery, I realised that for the past 5 years I had been wearing apologetic earrings. Small, fitting in, pearl earrings that were quiet, professional and plain.

I decided in that moment that they didn't suit me anymore. No longer would I represent myself as someone who wears apologetic earrings.

I chose two pairs - some beautiful ruby and diamond sparkly earrings that I had been keeping for a 'special occasion' and a pair of bold, gold dangly earrings I bought at a recent expo.

When I went through the photos to choose one for this newsletter banner, I did have a passing thought that maybe the earrings in the images were a bit too dangly. Maybe a bit too showy, not 'professional' enough. Then I recognised the inner voice of self doubt - the one that says "people like you don't wear earrings like that, put yourself out there like that, present yourself like that - get back in your box where you belong!"

I thought of Lola and chose to ignore it.

We can spend a lifetime fitting in, leaving our favourite jewellery for special occasions, the crystal glasses for when the guests turn up and waiting for someone to come along and give us permission to fully express who we truly are.

But what if the special occasion doesn't come, the guests don't turn up and the person who really needs to give you permission to be your authentic self is you?

My new resolution is never to wear apologetic earrings. To represent myself as bolder, freer...and more dangly.

I wonder what the equivalent could be for you? Where might the voice in your head be encouraging you to fit in to avoid standing out? Where are you holding back and compromising who you really are, what it is you really want to wear, or the places you want to go? What is your version of apologetic earrings and what would it take to be bolder, more daring and perhaps more dangly?

Maybe an earring audit is a good place to start.

Carry on...being more of who you already are.